i wish i grew a spine, i wish i could be sarcastic, i wish i could speak up for myself, i wish my mind were stronger.

just someone, tell me what to do. tell me what is wrong.

im so numb right now. when conflict happened again, i stopped feeling sad about it. my heart was pounding, was it from anger, or from sadness, i don't know. i want to know what's wrong, and tell me what to do.

someone tell me, whose fault was it. is it my problem, is it my attitude.

should i cry, should i apologise, should i fight back, should i be concerned.

should i change, should i not bother about them anymore, should i be the speechless sheep that gets shot down each time.

each time i got shot, i told myself never mind. just do it again. because i want it more than they do.

what do i need, what is wrong, what can i do.

what should i do.

loneliness isn't that easy a battle to fight.