right here right now, im in the peak of my stress level and rock bottom of my self-esteem.

all my life, i never felt as much worthless, stupid, useless, until i entered this god forsaken course. once again, i've succeeded in convincing myself that i am indeed stupid. i don't remember entering this course thinking im stupid, and yes, after 4 years, i see the power of chemical engineering in crushing one's self-confidence totally.

mistake, mistake, mistake.

i let this happen to myself.

i can think and think about it forever... and find myself hating my bloody cbe life more than ever.

i really want to love something about it...zilch.