2010
First post of the year, and this marks the 4th year for this blog. cheers~
it's been a while since i last spent the countdown at home. just me and parents. wished my mum happy new year while my dad slept it away. it's been such a terribly long night. bored to death at home, like seriously. haha~
this year, i will see a lot of people flying, being out of my life temporarily. i can imagine how terrible the next holidays are gonna be. there would be no one around. at the same time, these people really make me wonder what i'm doing with my life. while they're out there experiencing the world, here i am, happy being within my comfort zone. there's so much to learn, yet i'm too scared to learn. they have aims and ambitions, and here i am, being unhappy about small things in life.
as i watched my dad sleep his countdown away, i thought about the number of countdowns he has had in his entire life. when i reach his age, probably, a new year would just be any other day in my life. there is no special meaning, nothing to look forward to, no cause to celebrate. it would just mean, i get older by yet another year, and my kids move a further distance, away from me, and deeper into their lives.
i imagine groups of friends out there. possibly laughing happily, downing a couple of drinks, taking photos, exchanging cards and simply having a good time. couples watching the fireworks together, and just sitting side by side, talking about the future, talking about 2010. crowds crawling, snaking within itself, underneath the city lights. there is vibrance, energy, hope. and away in the suburbans, another dormant group, like my dad, who slept through it all.
as the fireworks exploded in my tv screen, i stood at the kitchen window and looked up into the skies. the skies are clear and bright, lit by the solitary moon, round and white. the clouds seem to have made way for the moon tonight. then i remember this thing about 'if i'm the moon then you're the sun. without you i won't shine.' hhhaha.
no new year resolutions for now.
thoughts running through my mind. picturing life in the coming year. the have beens, could bes, should have beens. maybes, will bes, might have beens.
just like that, 2009 ended without a bang, while 2010 crept in.
hello 2010~ =)
it's been a while since i last spent the countdown at home. just me and parents. wished my mum happy new year while my dad slept it away. it's been such a terribly long night. bored to death at home, like seriously. haha~
this year, i will see a lot of people flying, being out of my life temporarily. i can imagine how terrible the next holidays are gonna be. there would be no one around. at the same time, these people really make me wonder what i'm doing with my life. while they're out there experiencing the world, here i am, happy being within my comfort zone. there's so much to learn, yet i'm too scared to learn. they have aims and ambitions, and here i am, being unhappy about small things in life.
as i watched my dad sleep his countdown away, i thought about the number of countdowns he has had in his entire life. when i reach his age, probably, a new year would just be any other day in my life. there is no special meaning, nothing to look forward to, no cause to celebrate. it would just mean, i get older by yet another year, and my kids move a further distance, away from me, and deeper into their lives.
i imagine groups of friends out there. possibly laughing happily, downing a couple of drinks, taking photos, exchanging cards and simply having a good time. couples watching the fireworks together, and just sitting side by side, talking about the future, talking about 2010. crowds crawling, snaking within itself, underneath the city lights. there is vibrance, energy, hope. and away in the suburbans, another dormant group, like my dad, who slept through it all.
as the fireworks exploded in my tv screen, i stood at the kitchen window and looked up into the skies. the skies are clear and bright, lit by the solitary moon, round and white. the clouds seem to have made way for the moon tonight. then i remember this thing about 'if i'm the moon then you're the sun. without you i won't shine.' hhhaha.
no new year resolutions for now.
thoughts running through my mind. picturing life in the coming year. the have beens, could bes, should have beens. maybes, will bes, might have beens.
just like that, 2009 ended without a bang, while 2010 crept in.
hello 2010~ =)
posted by yanjun @ 12:37 AM
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